Hozuki Water Pistol

[KEITH]

Suikenjū (Water Pistol)
Rank: A.
Type: Offensive / Clan Ninjutsu
Range: 0 - 10 meters.
Chakra: High.
Special: Each time Suikenjū is retrained, the distance that it can travel is an additional 5 meters. The technique can only be retrained an additional 3 times.
Description: Suikenjū is a Ninjutsu technique used by the Hozuki clan. It is a unique technique, that allows the user to shoot a highly pressurized bullet of water at their desired target, with each power to pierce through the human, unprotected body, like if it was a steel bullet. The Hozuki using their Hydration technique, will shape their hand in the resemblance of a gun, with the index finger being the barrel. They'll fire a bullet the size of their index fingers tip. The bullet can travel double the speed of a kunai.
Domain: Hozuki. ‘A’ ranked Hydration.

[Sayomi]

you might want to fix some grammar mistakes, and stuff also, you should make it travel 10 meters with 5 extra meters per retrain.

[KEITH]

edited, i think i fixed everything.

[Sayomi]

allowing the user to shoot a highly pressurized bullet of water at the user

After you fix that 1.2 ^

[KEITH]

i changed that already.

[chiatsuki]

There needs to be some type of clarification on how powerful this is. What is the extent of its power? What can it pierce through? How strong is it? < Answer one of those questions by placing it into the description or special.

[KEITH]

it's strong enough to pierce through skin, it's already up there.

[addy-hime ♥]

I only have one real issue with this. "... making it almost impossible to avoid when up at point-blank range." This is pretty much self-explanatory. If you're close to the opponent, it's going to be harder to dodge than if you were far away. I'd like to see this removed, because leaving it in the technique description makes it seem unavoidable all together. However, I want you to add a speed of the bullet, either in meters per second or relative to a kunai (since that's what a lot of projectile techniques are compared to).

[/justify]

[KEITH]

edited.

[chiatsuki]

We done here?
1²

[KEITH]

i'm done, but, so people know it only pierces skin, nothing else. so, it isnt as powerful as the one on the manga/show.

[addy-hime ♥]

archived upon request.