Mist Style Swordsmanship

[.// h a y a t o]

KIRIGAKURE-RYU KENJUTSU - 霧隠れ流 剣術

Kirigakure-ryu Hakugiri [Lit. White Mist]
Rank: D
Type: Offensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Low
Special: Allows the user to utilize the Mist, either created or natural to blend in and blend in to slash the enemy
Description: This move requires the use of mist to able to execute. The first technique used in Kirigakure-style swordsmanship, the user would take their sword in front of them with one hand, unsheathed as the user would make a handseal with the other hand. With the handseal, the user would close their eyes as they blend in with the mist. Can use this technique with Kiri Shiryoku to see their opponent. Whether to see or not, the user would perform Shunshin no Jutsu as soon as they hear the slightest movement from the enemy. A highly-trained user and assassin will benefit from this technique as it deals with sensory and silent kills. Once the user is in their range, then they will place their other hand onto the hilt of the sword as they perform a "X" slash motion to the foe's back or front, if positioned. This will not work in broad daylight.
Domain: Kenjutsu/ Kirigakure no Jutsu


Kirigakure-Ryu - Kiyo Enmu [Lit. Cleansing Mist]
Rank: D, C, B
Type: Defensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Mid, High
Special: Able to spin and wash away incoming weapons such as shuriken, kunai other small projectile and even poison.
Description: A defensive technique in Kirigakure-ryu. When surrounded by water, the user would spin with their sword and by adding chakra to the sword, they will coat the water with the chakra and would make a small twister around the user and with each revolution adds more velocity and more stability in the defense. But by spinning, it will make the practitioner dizzy and disoriented. A skilled user can spin twice and erect the twister in mere seconds. When the twister is up, it will block normal shuriken, kunai and other projectiles. Skilled users can use this technique's defense to block larger weapons. The strength of the technique is equal to the water around them, their stamina level and chakra. The technique will slow to a stop as soon as the user stops spinning.
Domain: Kenjutsu, Suiton


Kirigakure-Ryu - Mimeigiri [Lit. Early Dawn Mist]
Rank: D
Type: Offensive/ Kenjutsu
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Low
Special: With the Mist surrounding the user, with skillful maneuverability and stealth, can deliver a lethal thrust stab to their enemy.
Description: A basic but fundamental move in Kirigakure-ryu. This technique must be done in cooperation with mist otherwise, the move would lose its specialty. When in the Mist with their opponent, the user would advance forward by using either Shunshin or another high-speed movement technique. Then with their sword forward, the user would perform a linear straight thrust to the opponent.
Domain: Kenjutsu, Kirigakure no Jutsu


Kirigakure-Ryu - Mizu Kibagiri [Water Fang Slash]
Rank: C, B, A
Type: Offensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Mid
Special: Creates a crescent-like slash of pressurized water with chakra with the slash of the sword able to cut other water constructs down the middle and some solids depending on the chakra used for the slash.
Description: An offensive technique from Kirigakure. With the sword unsheathed, the user would find any water on the ground or from a body of water and place the tip of the sword on it. Depending on the size of the water source, the effects will in fact vary. Then the user would channel their chakra into their blade to coat the blade. Then with either an upward or downward motion, the water would form into a crescent shaped projectile at the target fused with the person's chakra. Depending on the chakra used, it can cut clothes, flash, stone or non- elemental chakra jutsu. The minimum input of chakra and water balance used in the slash is 3 meters and 10 inches thick.
The maximum length and width is 10 meters high and 2 meters wide.
Domain: Kenjutsu, Hien, Suiton


Kirigakure-Ryu - Shinotsukugiri [Lit. Pelting Mist]
Rank: B
Type: Offensive, Defensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Mid
Special: Gives the user an offensive and defensive attack in one by slashing around themselves.
Description: a hybrid technique of the kenjutsu style. This can be used without mist or without water. The user would run forward with their unsheathed sword in front of them. The the user would jump forward in a leap and would perform a series of four slashes around the user. This is ideal when dealing with multiple opponents or dealing with incoming projectiles.
Domain: Kirigakure-ryu, Kenjutsu

• Shinotsukugiri - Suijingetsu [Lit. Pelting Mist - Water Bladed Moon]
  Rank: A
  Type: Offensive, Defensive
  Range: Close
  Stamina/Chakra: High
  Special: Same as above. With the added bonus using the water fused chakra to create a whip to add more damage
  Description: A variant of the Original Shinotsukugiri. If the user is by water, they can channel their chakra into their blade and coat the water with the chakra and sharpen it. Then with the series of slashes, the chakra enhanced water would provide much more protection as a defense and would cut most substance and flesh but not to the degree of a fatal cut and may cause internal damage. Must learn Shinotsukugiri.
  Domain: Kirigakure-ryu, Hien, Kenjutsu, Suiton.
  

Kirigakure-Ryu - Futaegiri [Lit. Double Mist]
Rank: B
Type: Kenjutsu, Suiton, Offensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Mid
Special: Sets up the enemy by using a Kiri Bunshin to attack in the user's stead, while the original is lying in the wait. Once the clone is dispersed, the Original can make a move.
Description: The requirements in this techniques are key. The user must have Mist around them, either natural or created and must know Kiri Bunshin no Jutsu. The user would create a clone within the mist. Being that it is significantly slower than the original, the user themselves must be very skilled otherwise the opponent will know when they fight, it'll be a dead give-away. Once created, the original will conceal themselves within the mist while clone fights the opponent. As soon as the enemy defeats the clone, the Kiri Bunshin would dissipate into mist as it was made of and cloud the users sight with a thick shroud of it. This will give the original a chance to attack. When the opponent leaves an opening, the user can perform a numerous set of attacks to finish their opponent.
Domain: Kirigakure-ryu, Kenjutsu, Suiton, Kiri Bunshin

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[Kii!]

Kirigakure-ryu Hakugiri [Lit. White Mist]
Rank: D
Type: Offensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Low
Special: Allows the user to utilize the Mist, either created or natural to blend in and blend in to slash the enemy
Description: This move requires the use of mist to able to execute. The first technique used in Kirigakure-style swordsmanship, the user would take their sword in front of them with one hand, unsheathed as the user would make a handseal with the other hand. With the handseal, the user would close their eyes as they blend in with the mist. Can use this technique with Kiri Shiryoku to see their opponent. Whether to see or not, the user would perform Shunshin no Jutsu as soon as they hear the slightest movement from the enemy. A highly-trained user and assassin will benefit from this technique as it deals with sensory and silent kills. Once the user is in their range, then they will place their other hand onto the hilt of the sword as they perform a "X" slash motion to the foe's back or front, if positioned. This will not work in broad daylight.
Domain: Kenjutsu/ Kirigakure no Jutsu

This is . . . more than just one technique. First thing to note: under type, you should specify taijutsu/ninjutsu/genjutsu/nintaijutsu. I'm not really sure what to think about this. First, you blend into the mist using a hand seal (therefore using chakra, making this at least partially ninjutsu, correct?), and then you wait until you can locate the opponent, and then you have to use shunshin, and then you have to slash in an 'X' while shunshin-ing? This infringes a bit on Ju Kenshin, and also splits up one technique into two or three parts. I'm thinking, if you want the concealment and shunshin attack, it needs to be separate. That, or just make this a concealment technique, and RP the rest out. If it requires shunshin, that should be in the domain, as well.

Kirigakure-Ryu - Kiyo Enmu [Lit. Cleansing Mist]
Rank: D, C, B
Type: Defensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Mid, High
Special: Able to spin and wash away incoming weapons such as shuriken, kunai other small projectile and even poison.
Description: A defensive technique in Kirigakure-ryu. When surrounded by water, the user would spin with their sword and by adding chakra to the sword, they will coat the water with the chakra and would make a small twister around the user and with each revolution adds more velocity and more stability in the defense. But by spinning, it will make the practitioner dizzy and disoriented. A skilled user can spin twice and erect the twister in mere seconds. When the twister is up, it will block normal shuriken, kunai and other projectiles. Skilled users can use this technique's defense to block larger weapons. The strength of the technique is equal to the water around them, their stamina level and chakra. The technique will slow to a stop as soon as the user stops spinning.
Domain: Kenjutsu, Suiton

Like before, please note taijutsu/ninjutsu etc. in the type. Secondly, since this uses both chakra and stamina, it should require both as a cost (even if the chakra cost is minimal). So can you just break stamina/chakra into two lines, and note the cost for each? I'd assume this will have a higher stamina cost than chakra cost, as it's primarily a taijutsu-oriented style.

Kirigakure-Ryu - Mimeigiri [Lit. Early Dawn Mist]
Rank: D
Type: Offensive/ Kenjutsu
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Low
Special: With the Mist surrounding the user, with skillful maneuverability and stealth, can deliver a lethal thrust stab to their enemy.
Description: A basic but fundamental move in Kirigakure-ryu. This technique must be done in cooperation with mist otherwise, the move would lose its specialty. When in the Mist with their opponent, the user would advance forward by using either Shunshin or another high-speed movement technique. Then with their sword forward, the user would perform a linear straight thrust to the opponent.
Domain: Kenjutsu, Kirigakure no Jutsu

I feel like this infringes directly on Ju Kenshi (as in, it's exactly the same as a Ju Kenshi technique, except you do it in the mist). So honestly, I don't see this as acceptable unless something big changes. Using a Ju Kenshi technique in the mist just isn't enough for me to believe it warrants its own skill.

Kirigakure-Ryu - Mizu Kibagiri [Water Fang Slash]
Rank: C, B, A
Type: Offensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Mid
Special: Creates a crescent-like slash of pressurized water with chakra with the slash of the sword able to cut other water constructs down the middle and some solids depending on the chakra used for the slash.
Description: An offensive technique from Kirigakure. With the sword unsheathed, the user would find any water on the ground or from a body of water and place the tip of the sword on it. Depending on the size of the water source, the effects will in fact vary. Then the user would channel their chakra into their blade to coat the blade. Then with either an upward or downward motion, the water would form into a crescent shaped projectile at the target fused with the person's chakra. Depending on the chakra used, it can cut clothes, flash, stone or non- elemental chakra jutsu. The minimum input of chakra and water balance used in the slash is 3 meters and 10 inches thick.
The maximum length and width is 10 meters high and 2 meters wide.
Domain: Kenjutsu, Hien, Suiton

Does this require hien? I'm not understanding why hien is in the domain, I don't think it needs to require it. Anyways, separate chakra and stamina cost, please. Also, flesh out the different ranks of the technique. What I mean is, it goes up in rank, but you have no specifics as to what changes (obviously the strength does). I would recommend simply allowing the size of the crescent (as detailed at the bottom of the description) to increase with the rank, otherwise creating larger crescents would require more chakra/water, which could be a pain to accurately map out for each rank.

Shinotsukugiri - Suijingetsu [Lit. Pelting Mist - Water Bladed Moon]
Rank: A
Type: Offensive, Defensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: High
Special: Same as above. With the added bonus using the water fused chakra to create a whip to add more damage
Description: A variant of the Original Shinotsukugiri. If the user is by water, they can channel their chakra into their blade and coat the water with the chakra and sharpen it. Then with the series of slashes, the chakra enhanced water would provide much more protection as a defense and would cut most substance and flesh but not to the degree of a fatal cut and may cause internal damage. Must learn Shinotsukugiri.
Domain: Kirigakure-ryu, Hien, Kenjutsu, Suiton.

This will need a range of sorts (for the water--how far does it extend in all directions from the user?). Secondly, needs separate stamina and chakra costs.

Kirigakure-Ryu - Futaegiri [Lit. Double Mist]
Rank: B
Type: Kenjutsu, Suiton, Offensive
Range: Close
Stamina/Chakra: Mid
Special: Sets up the enemy by using a Kiri Bunshin to attack in the user's stead, while the original is lying in the wait. Once the clone is dispersed, the Original can make a move.
Description: The requirements in this techniques are key. The user must have Mist around them, either natural or created and must know Kiri Bunshin no Jutsu. The user would create a clone within the mist. Being that it is significantly slower than the original, the user themselves must be very skilled otherwise the opponent will know when they fight, it'll be a dead give-away. Once created, the original will conceal themselves within the mist while clone fights the opponent. As soon as the enemy defeats the clone, the Kiri Bunshin would dissipate into mist as it was made of and cloud the users sight with a thick shroud of it. This will give the original a chance to attack. When the opponent leaves an opening, the user can perform a numerous set of attacks to finish their opponent.
Domain: Kirigakure-ryu, Kenjutsu, Suiton, Kiri Bunshin

I'm not exactly sure why this is a technique. It seems more like . . . a tactic? Why couldn't you simply do this without spending 100 EXP on a B rank description of the tactic? What I mean is, I don't see any reason for this to be a technique--it doesn't create any new effects, it doesn't describe a specific physical maneuver that it would add the B-rank damage to, it just sort of describes a plan. So, what was it you intended with this technique? I'm not sure how to help fix it.

[KID GAMBINO.]

You have until October 4th, 2011 to edit this, or it will be archived.

[KID GAMBINO.]

Archived.