cut cut stab

[Kobayashi]

SPOILER: Click to show

Since “Ototon” has been removed for the listings because it is no longer considered a real release anymore, I assume that all possible Ototon techniques now fall under the domain of Fūton. These following techniques have been created with that assumption in mind.

Fūton: Jigoku no Mimi [Wind Release: Hell’s Ears]

Rank: D
Type: Supplementary, Defensive
Range: Ten meters
Handseals: 4
Chakra: Low
Special: This technique’s range will increase by ten meters each time retrained. For every fourth retraining the chakra consumption will go up by one. This taps out at eighty meters.
Description: Kobayashi must first place his ear to the floor and augment his hearing through the use of chakra. He will then be able to hear and discern the vibrations in the floor beneath him. As long as something is touching the floor, he will be able to detect the size, general shape, distance, and location of anything within his range.
Domain: Fūton

Exp: 25

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Miburuken no Jutsu [Art of the Shivering Blade]

Type: Offensive, Taijutsu, Ninjutsu, Kenjutsu
Range: D, C, B, A, S
Special: Allows the swordsman to progress through the teachings of Miburuken no Jutsu
Description: Miburuken is an offensive sword style that exploits the user’s proficiency in Ninjutsu. The user channels his or her Fūton chakra through their blade while making use of the style’s low and loose stances. Miburuken practitioners pride themselves on their swift strikes and versatile range.
Domain: Ninkenjutsu?

Exp: 75

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Busy Hands

Rank: D
Type: Supplementary
Range: —
Special: Allows the swordsman to fight more efficiently
Description: Putting down one’s sword in order to form the handseals required to utilize Ninjutsu alongside their Kenjutsu is laughably inefficient. Having practiced the Miburuken sword style for over a decade, Kobayashi has spent many years honing his skill and proficiency when it comes to chakra moulding. He is now able to bypass the need for creating handseals. However, the amount of time it takes to charge his chakra, mould it, and cast his jutsu is equal to the time it would have normally taken him to create the handseals the technique would have required anyway.
Domain: Ninkenjutsu

Will soon be replaced by a "1 handed seal upgrade".

Exp: 25

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Yurasu [Tremble]

Rank: C
Type: Supplementary
Range: —
Chakra: Mid to cast, free to maintain
Special: Utilizing the wind element, the Miburuken practitioner channels their Fūton chakra into their sword causing it to vibrate at a very high rate. If maintained, this jutsu will cause ‘C’ ranked damage to be stacked onto any strike while the sword is vibrating. Learning ‘B’ rank “Art of the Shivering Blade” increases the damage by one rank. Damage is also calculated per strike.
Description: By charging their chakra and channelling it into their weapon, said weapon will begin to vibrate at an astonishing rate, though unnoticeable to the naked eye. This is the staple technique of the Miburuken style and the main reason it is known as the “Art of the Shivering Blade”. It is the central technique for many of the style’s attacks. With this technique, the cutting ability of the user’s sword will increase significantly.
Domain: Ninkenjutsu

Exp: 50

Total Exp: 175

[Hotaru]

1) 1|2 Denied. We removed ototon for a reason. Plus, wind dominion caps at 20 meters, making this technique almost useless.

2) 1|2 This has no rank, and doesnt make any sense.

3) 1|2 Never. This a) completely bypasses the drawback of using a sword and ninjutsu in your arsenal. and b) is a laughable way to get around buying the 1 handed seals upgrade.

4) 1|2. Ranked damage has been removed from the site and is no longer how force is calculated. On top of that, gives you an insane boost for a minuscule cost.

[Kobayashi]

1) "We dropped ototon as a release considering its not canon. It was just ninjutsu that amplified a musical/sound instrument."

This was the reason given to me as to why Ototon was removed. If this is not the case, than can you please explain to me why Ototon was removed? I had planned to revolve my character around the theme of using a sound-based sword style. If sound based techs are completely dropped, I'd really like to know why.

2) I copied and pasted the template and accidentally left it out. I'll edit and fix that.

3) Well, I didn't know there was a 1 handed seal upgrade. If something like this was already out, I could just get that instead. I wasn't trying to bypass something I didn't even know existed. <.< So where can I find this "upgrade"? I've been on this site for a week or so now and have looked through all the info. I didn't see something like this anywhere. Can you give me a link so I can replace this technique with your "1 handed seal upgrade"?

4) The others are all something I can either outright remove or edit to fix whatever was wrong with them. This one, however, is something I really need, so minus the stacking thing could you help me in making it so that it complies with your standards?

Edit: As for number two not making any sense, it's just the basis of the sword style. I modelled it after the site's "Iaijutsu" and "Battōjutsu". Like I said earlier, I wanted to make my own unique style of sword fighting. This is just the name and basis of my kenjutsu.

[Hotaru]

1) Hells ears isnt amplifying any sound with an instrument. It's just a cheap way around entering a sensing style.

3) here

One-Handed Jutsu!
Limit: One (per character).
Cost: 6'000 EXP or 170,000 ryo.
Purchasing this allows the user to permanently perform any jutsu they know with a single hand.

2 & 4 ) These dont make a ton of sense to couple with kenjutsu. If you're serious about making a 'vibration' sword style, I suggest you commit to creating a custom style.

[Kobayashi]

1) *sigh* Y'know, I took it from the Naruto wiki site not as a "cheap way around entering a sensing style", but to essentially test the waters with this Ototon thing. Why do you have a negative opinion of everything? "Laughable way of getting around the one-handed jutsu", "cheap way around entering a sensing style", but fine, whatever. Like I said, it wasn't really needed, I just wanted to test the grounds with making an Ototon jutsu.

However, from what you're saying, it sounds to me that as long as I am indeed amplifying sound with an instrument (or *cough* a sword) that I will be allowed to make these kinds of sound-based jutsu, right?

3) Thank you very much. Since this is essential to making my ninkenjutsu style, I guess I'll put the rest of my tech making on hold until I get either 6k exp or 170k ryo. Also, there are some things in the link that I need as well, so thanks again for your help in this area.

2 & 4) Actually, just yesterday I ran across the thread that gives the requirements to create a custom Taijutsu styles. I don't think creating a Kenjutsu style is any different. So by your suggestion of "committing to creating a custom style" are you saying that I need to follow these same guidelines? The main one being "In order to submit a custom FS, you must have at least ten (10) unique techniques within the style, not including some sort of base knowledge that starts them all"? Because if this is the case, I don't have nearly enough exp to submit 10 techniques to be approved and I'll have to put my creation of this Kenjutsu style on hold.

Depending on your answer to my questions I will most like save these two techniques in a PM to myself, toss out just about every thing I've submitted already and replace them with a few techs I can use immediately, leaving those ones up for possible approval.

[Naitome]

1) If you took it from a Naruto Wiki Site, then it's presumably a Canon Technique, meaning you'd have to get Admin Permission beforehand to even make the technique, which I know you don't have, because the admin wouldn't give it to you. Ototon is not happening. No explanation or reasoning will change that. If it's not really needed, don't submit it.

2&4) I have no idea what you're talking about with this whole "enough exp to submit custom techniques thing", but you don't need EXP to submit customs. I'd suggest reading the custom rules and guidelines threads a little more thoroughly.

An Addendum: Please, please, please. It is our job to critique what you post in customs. Nobody has a personal negative agenda towards you, because we don't know you. We're performing a task. Try not to take things as an attack. If you want personal help with how to submit techniques that are more acceptable, PM me, and I'll help you out individually, on my own time. But your moral value judgments of the LM's "opinion of everything"....just stop that, okay?

[Hotaru]

You know Hell's Ears from the wiki? Wanna see the 'user' of this technique? Takeo Hyuuga. Need I say more?

4) I'm saying that I dont think you should be able to stack kenjutsu techniques with these sound based techniques. You'll have to separate it to another discipline that you create. Even then there's no guarantee that they'll be accepted. Sound based techniques are a touchy subject on NRP and I'm not promising anything. Still, since you seem attached to the idea, i'm trying to give you the best chance for success.

Also, it would actually be easier to submit the new techniques in a new thread rather than keep using this one x:

[King]

Like Hotaru said, I'm just going to point out that you took it from a fan-based Naruto Wikia site. If you click the character that uses the technique (which was created by a fan; it isn't canon), you'll notice that it's a... Roleplay character.

I just figured I'd go ahead and point that out to deflate some of this passive-aggressive arrogance going on in here.

My team isn't here to antagonize you or cause you unnecessary problems. So, the subtle jabs at them like they are is going to stop. Keep it up, and you'll find your "custom" privileges revoked.

[Kobayashi]

In relevance to my "passive aggressive arrogance", I said what I said because the condescension in her words were pretty blatant. As for your team not out to antagonize me, I made one remark about her condescension and both another lead mod and even the admin jumped on me out of the blue, one even threatened me with revoking my customs privileges. So yes, I do feel like I'm being antagonized.

As for there being fan-made techs and even characters on that site, that's honestly news to me. I didn't know they were making there own stuff, for the longest time I thought it was just a site listing canon techniques. I'll refrain from using it as any sort of reference from now.

4) I had no intention of even using the Kenjutsu techniques of the site. That's why I made the Miburuken as the head and basis of the style. I was gonna make an entirely separate discipline all together. So stacking really wouldn't be an issue. My fourth technique was meant to be used in conjunction with, and bolster the strength of other techniques in its style only. That's why I made note of it being an important technique in that specific style.

[Hotaru]

have you saved what you want from this thread?

Doesnt seem to be a lot of discussion left to be done here, so i'll archive it and await your custom style.

ya?

[Kobayashi]

No, actually, I didn't. But now I have, thanks for waiting. Go ahead and archive it.

And just to clear things up, I do apologize. =]

Nai: If you wouldn't mind, I'd like to take you up on your offer.

[Hotaru]

archived ~