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With a grimace, I looked down at my gnarled limbs. I’d expended nearly all of the chakra I’d gained using my soldier pill on healing them, and still I’d yet to even heal more than an inch or two of skin back at my shoulder. What skin did recover through the use of Shousen no Jutsu was reddened and burned, likely forever scarred as a painful reminder of my waning sanity. And the pain was still unreal, coursing through me like fire, hindering my pathetic attempts at regaining myself through sheer power of will.

And yet, I’d have failed either way. My ashen gaze came to rest upon the form of a swordsman, taken abruptly by the tail of the massive beast and thrown into its chakra blast, consuming him entirely. In that moment, whatever progress I’d made to calm myself was instantly erased, and I could only just resist crying out. My bloodied, skinless hands curled into fists with a fierce intensity, so tight that I’d have drawn blood even had I still had skin to protect my hands. Instead, my aching fingers punctured the muscle of my palm, giving way to four streams of pure crimson, though the pain hardly shook my tormented mind. I only stared at the place where the swordsman had been--had lived, moments before--and I shook my head, bringing my hands to it as I did and staining my white hair with scarlet. Again those feelings flooded my mind: rage, sorrow, wrath, and a desire to kill. My mouth hung agape, and my eyes were wide, shaking in their disbelief.

Then I’d snapped back to my senses, if only for a fleeting moment. I drew my attention away from the killing beast, turning my back on it, instead focusing on keeping myself alive. If I died, there was no way I would be able to exact my justice upon it. As I did, the pain became all too clear once more, and I realized that I’d drawn a trail of blood as I walked. That I was bleeding out, and I’d die if I didn’t do something. Stopping the flow of Shousen chakra, I conserved a minimal amount of chakra before reaching down into my pouch and retrieving a second pill. This was a different type of pill, however, one that I hoped would save my life, at least momentarily. Closing my eyes, I slipped the pill into my mouth and attempted to calm myself once more, pushing away the overwhelming emotions I’d succumbed to earlier.

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1 Zoketsugan (Blood Increasing Pill)